"If the boy don't love you right now
He will never ever, never ever love you
He will never ever, never ever love you"
neverevernevereverNever Ever, Ciara

U r tougher than u think

"Last time when your dad is away, i can never sleep well in the night. When there's any noices out of the window, I will open my eye and started to wander around and try to make sure the room is safe--or at least my kids are safe around me. It was the toughest time in my life."

That is what being said by my auntie. I can see there's still some terrified eyes in her. The fear of being alone, without the man in the house.

Wife without husband, a women without a man, just for few days.

My mum had been practised this for years. Till now, 10 years.
And the years still on count.

I wonder how many strength are there in her small body. Strength to withstand the loneliness; strength to do the husband's work; strength to be a mum, and a dad as well. How strong she can be?

When the bulbs in the room were spoiled, how she fixed it when she don't even know how to take them off?

When the tyres of the car were leak, how she fixed it when she barely know how to drive car?

When the letter from government arrived, how she read them when she don't even know the letter is for who?

I wonder how she did it. When dad was not with us.
I wonder how she felt. When we were so young to help her in anything.
I wonder how she get through all those days.

Mum, I love you.

Cherry Blossom

I realise that i'm getting more n more reluctant to write something to describe some event that happened in my daily life and i feel that i have no good opening for any of them so i guess that is the reason i seldom talk about what happen in my life which leads to my non-stop mumble and non-sense posts in the last few posts but now i finally get some clue to keep update with my blog and i need not to thinkof any kind of fancy words to grab u all' attention that is to post the picture alone.

Anyway...i must say something about this....this is the sexiest chick ever alive in my uni...damn sizzling hot right???

My Exam Time-table

18 April 2009: Ethics MidYear
22 April 2009: Physics Topic Test
28 April 2009: Biology Topic Test
29 April 2009: Mathematics Topic Test
11-14 May 2009: Mid Year Examination


I'm dying...someone rescue me pls :P

mumble

i wish to hav a girl friend before the age of 24, and she will be the women who i will be marry to at the end of the day.

she must be caring.
she must love my family, just as much as she does to her own family.
she must love kids.

we will hav 2 kids.
1 boy.
1 girl.
or maybe 1 more girl, i like to have daughters.
daughter will help to massage her daddy when daddy is tired.

we will hav our own house. not too big. i hate the feeling of emptiness. a normal house will do. i wan to hav my mum staying wif me. i wan to take care of her. if my mother in law wan to, she could stay wif us too.
age people need lots of attention and care. i will love her mum as much as i do to my mum too.

and i love to hav dogs of our own. which can help to cheer up the house. i love big dogs. not tiny lil paris hilton those.

will mumble more in the future.

I'm sick =(

yea, I'm sick, once again. this time lil asthmatian n fluen come n lawat me at the same time, beh tahan@.@

again, dis had been a hard week for me, after all i've to go throughout the week...again, assignments and tests n quizes attempt their very best to push me to a limit, and c how i'm going to jump across the wall, a fuckin' barrier between a dead me and a breathing me.

"have fun in your first sem, cuz u going to suffer a lot, and a lot in the 2nd n 3rd sem"
victorvictorvictorvictorvictorvictorvictorvictor(my long-lost-contact-senior Victor, 2008)

i think this is it, isn't it? this is the suffer he mentioned before, right?
anyway, i still haven't reach my limit yet. come on, i still fighting. although i lose a lot, but u see, i'm still surviving, don't i?

everytime i try to start my blog, involuntarily, i will start with: I dunno.... It seems to be my way to escape from any kind of responsible and try to put the blame on my innocence.

i dunno why i do that,
i dunno how come i make this decision,
i dunno why i behave this way.

yes, lots of i dunno,
and in fact, i know.

i know, i can do it better. i know, i still hav the fire in me. i know, i know i knew it.

although i'm sick, i try very hard not to let it knock me down. i still attend classes as usual, eat as usual, and study very hard as usual. i try to forget the fact i cant breath normally (thanks to my asthma) and cant c things clearly (my recent illness, dunno why) , and lost most of my sence (thanks to flu). i love the way im treating myself now. it make me feel like im a superman -- with limited health, of cuz.

throughout this week, a number of people had let me down.

"after all that u had put me through, u think i'm going to despite u. but in the end, i wanna thank you, cuz u make me tat much stronger. "
Stronger, Christina AguileraStronger, Christina Aguilera Stronger, Christina Aguilera

yea, this is wut i wanna say. i dun feel anything, seriously. i still hav my life as usual, i still behave like the old me, i'm still me. the way u do on me just make me realise how realistic u r. i wont ask for anything from u, anymore. i wont. and i hope i can fly soon, and pls, i dun wan to be in the same uni wif u, or even the same part of australia, pls dun.

just so fed up. but i gotta say, family is something which can always cheer me up.

I don’t know what’s right and what’s real anymore
I don’t know how I’m meant to feel anymore
When do you think it will all become clear?
Cuz I’m being taken over by the fear

lilyallenlilyallenlilyallenLily Allen -- The Fear

At first when I see you cry,
yeah it makes me smile, yeah it makes my smile
At worst I feel bad for a while,
but then I just smile I go ahead and smile

lilyallenlilyallenlilyallenLily Allen-- Smile

my weekends

had a miserable week -- thanks to chemistry test, and ausmat cafe as well-- and I can't think of a way to release myself other than.......(fill in the blank please :P)












DEFINATELY NOT READING =.=












AND FORGET ABOUT SLEEPING >.<













ALMOST RIGHT, BUT NOT WATCHING MOVIE ^.^













HAHA, CLUBBING???













NO! IS MENYANYI!!!













haha...had some really great moments with my roommates n others. And out of sudden, I start to feel like I belongs to them, but not clubber.

Haha, I'M slowly becoming GOOD BOY =.=

I screwed up...

I've working really hard for Chem, starting from last week.
Really memorise all da important things, even some which are not been mentioned in test book but in revision book.
But I screwed up.
Food poisoning.
Prawn allergy.

During the test, I sweated like I've never have before. I spent most of my time, trying very hard to wipe away the fluid covering my forehead and those blocking my views.
Stomach was pain like hell.
Head was like there's a huge stone inside, swinging here and there, knocking my skull.
I can only fill in all the spaces in the test paper, with anything that cross my mind at that moment.

If I wasn't work that hard before, I wont feel anything.
But this time, I really work for it, and failed to prove anything.
Thank you.